The tree of shame

I can't believe I'm saying this, but it's true. The tree is still standing in our house. It is so shameful. I really had planned to take it down this past weekend, but it didn't happen due to the Migraine from hell. Then I was going to take it down Monday, but boyfriend got delayed at work and I had a puppy to take care of, and before I knew it I was late making dinner and then it was time for bed. I'm starting to think that the tree is an evil genius. I think it's planning our demise so that it might take us out and take over the house. It's never left it's spot in the corner and yet I find pine needles all over the house, like it's slowly infultraiting. I think it might be bitter that we have hardwood floors or something. It's bitter about it's kindred trees and it's aiming to take us over and use us as flooring. It has managed to stay in our house far longer than I find acceptable, past the point of irritation and onto where I don't even notice it anymore. It's trying to convince me that it doesn't actually exist at all. It's almost working, but I'm going to fight back. I will not be sucked into it's piney trap. It's too late for boyfriend, though. It has him convinced that we shouldn't take it down at all. He is clearly posessed by the mystery of the evergreen. He's woefully tranced into thinking that the tree should merely have it's ornamnets removed and should remain in the house while we cut it up to use as kindling. Raise your stix if you think this is EVER going to happen.....

anybody?.....

Yeah, that's what I thought. I don't see anyone reaching for their knitting.
We have been in our house a little over a year and in that time only had one attempt at a fire. One attempt, and one failure. I'll let you do the math on your own. Have a friend help you if you can't work it out.
So, tonight, in an effort to free boyfriend of his flora induced delusion, I'm setting out to get the tree out of the house, and life back in order.
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As for the knitting I'm hoping to get the Irish Hiking scarf off the needles and into a bath tonight. That means Jes-2 Scarfs-1. It ocurred to me last night that I'd never seen a scarf on my grandfather and that it would be silly to spend tons of time making something he wouldn't wear. So instead, I'm thinking about doing this hat from I'm Knitting as Fast as I Can. I've never made a hat before, so I'm a little nervous, but I think I can do it. The only thing is that my Grandpa has a gigantic melon, like special order hats big, which is why I chose this pattern. This way I can keep increasing and increasing until it's big enough and not have to worry about making a pattern larger. That's a step I'm just not ready for. So, hopefully, tomorow I will be on my way to the LYS to get some big dpns and do my first project in the round! Wish me luck.

If tomorrow you don't see an FO report for the Irish Hiking scarf, you will know that the tree has taken over complete control of our house. Please send help - Lumberjacks preferred, strong people with pointy axes accepted.